Wednesday, March 4, 2015

READER'S ENTRY: Family Business (Part 1)

Family Business (Part 1)
by BLZBub

Follow ups: Part 2Part 3Part 4Part 5Part 6


  1. Congratulations on your win last month, BLZBub. I really looking forward to your newest story.

    I just have what I think is an important piece of advice. Though I've enjoyed both of your stories so far, and I've voted for you twice on the poll, there's something that still separates them from being perfect, and it's that you keep changing the models you use for a character. If you plan to use captions of the same character more than once, first make yourself sure that you have enough pics of the model you've selected. This has happened on both of your stories, and it's quite noticeable, specially when they switch from being some random woman to Adriana Lima, or the like.

    Something that I like about Planet's stories, is that she uses the same person for each character, except when they transform, of course. That gives the story a stronger sense of continuity and cohesion.

    Other than that, your work is outstanding, and I'm pretty sure you can fix that for future stories. Cheers!

    1. Thanks for the advice, but it's not that simple to follow. I'm not nearly as good as Planet at finding useable captions for these stories and quite frankly, I don't even know any models to selectively choose from. This is one of the main reasons I'm a freelancer with caption stories than something I do full-time. So you gotta settle for 'close-enough' pictures with these stories unless someone can point out a place where I can find consistent enough pictures to use.

    2. Planet has mentioned more than once that finding the images, particularly multiple images of the same person, is often the most difficult and time-consuming part of making the captions. I think that a certain degree of slack is warranted here. Obviously using the same model is ideal, but I wouldn't want a story cut short or not posted at all because not enough images could be found.

      Also, I for one find it detracts from a story when the model is someone well known, because I find it breaks the suspension of disbelief; except of course when they're actually turning into that person, like in "Using the Medallion." I for one would rather see three pictures of three different people I don't recognize, than three pictures of Angelina Jolie.

  2. I really like the family dynamic so far. Jake and Miwa already seem like a great couple and Philip and Jillian will probably be cute kids.

    Keep up the focus on each family member, it's really great. I'd like to see some interaction between the parents and kids, before and after the Reversion I should say.